Childlike Behavior
Hebrews 12:4-13 | Part 1-3
In talking about our relationship with God, the writer of Hebrews addresses the responsibilities of a loving father and the responsibilities of loving children. What do we expect of God as our Father and what does he expect of us as loving children?
Notes:
— PART 1—
When I was growing up my family attended a church in which we frequently, as part of our Sunday morning worship, recited what is commonly referred to as the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13). That prayer starts like this: “Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be your name….” Thinking of God as my heavenly Father was something I learned at an early age. Many of us think of God as our heavenly Father.
Do you think of God as your heavenly Father?
What kind of father is God to you? Do you think of him as father who is angry with you? How about a father who is disappointed in you? Is God an absent or disengaged/disinterested father? Is he a senile (but sweet) father? Or do you think of God as being a loving heavenly Father?
If you think of God as your loving heavenly Father (as I think most do), then you must have expectations for him as your loving Father. You expect him to love you. He should be there for you… whenever you need him, pray to him, cry out to him. He should do good things for you. He should protect you. He should deliver you from suffering.
What do you expect from God?
When God doesn’t meet our expectations as our heavenly Father we feel like there’s something wrong with God. He’s not acting like a loving father. When something bad happens to us we wonder where God is? Why didn’t he prevent it? Why doesn’t he do something about it? Why doesn’t he deliver us from evil? We might even doubt if there is a God.
Has God ever disappointed you? Have you doubted him?
I think there’s many who have been disappointed by God. Some give up on God altogether. Some get bitter toward God. Some become cold toward God. They may still practice religion, they may still go through the motions, but like a marriage that has gone bad, it’s only a shell, a sham of a relationship.
I don’t think being disappointed with God, doubting him, is necessarily a sign of weak or no faith. In fact, being disappointed with God can be the proof of genuine faith in God. Those who are never disappointed with God aren’t because they don’t expect anything from him. They have weak or no faith in God. Those who never doubt whether there is God or why he’s not doing what seems good, don’t because they never believed in God.
Jesus was disappointed with his Father: From the cross he cried, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me” (Matthew 27:46; see Psalm 22:1-2)? But in his disappointment we see his continued love for and trust in his Father: Jesus talked to, cried out to his Father. God was still “my” God to Jesus. It is great faith that, even when rebuked and scorned by God, persists, perseveres with God (see Matthew 15:21-28; see Helmut Thielicke sermons, The Silence of God and The Final Dereliction).
God has revealed himself to us as our Father. It is right, therefore, that we expect him to act toward us as a loving father would (see Luke 11:11-13). But isn’t also right that God, as our Father, should expect us to act like his children? What does God expect from his children?
— PART 2—
What responsibilities do we have as children of God?
Hebrews 12:4-13 addresses both the responsibilities of a loving Father and the responsibilities of loving children.
This is Eugene Peterson’s (The Message) translation of these verses:
4 In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! 5 So don't feel sorry for yourselves. [This letter was written to Christians who were suffering for their faith in all kinds of trials—including direct persecution. Their suffering should not cause them to doubt God’s love, to the contrary, the writer said it proves God’s love.] Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children?
My dear child, don't shrug off God's discipline,
but don't be crushed by it either.
6 It's the child he loves that he disciplines;
the child he embraces, he also corrects.
7 God is educating you; that's why you must never drop out. He's treating you as dear children. This trouble you're in isn't punishment; it's training, 8 the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? 9 We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God's training so we can truly live? 10 While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God's holy best. 11 At the time, discipline isn't much fun. It always feels like it's going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it's the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God.
Many of us take it for granted that God is personal, loving and engaged in this world and in our lives—he is aware of us. But we should appreciate what an amazing and wonderful revelation we have here that God gives us of himself and of our relationship with him (see Psalm 8:3-4; 144:3-4; 1 John 3:1). God is a personal God, not a force, a principle or cosmic consciousness; he’s not just a piece of wood, not an idol; he’s not a figment of our imagination. God is intimate. He is near to us. He is aware of what’s going on in this world and in your life. He is engaged in your life as a loving Father. He is working in your life on a personal level to train you to live God’s holy best.
Do you take this—God is your Father—for granted?
As your Father, what can you expect from him? He will use various trials and suffering to discipline you, correct you, educate you, train you and do whatever he needs to do to enable you to mature in your relationship with him. This is what you would expect from a loving earthly father. This is normal behavior for a responsible father. God wants his holy best for you. He will not leave you to yourself. He will not spoil you. Though it is painful and difficult, it is not punishment. You didn’t do anything wrong to deserve this. Your Father is doing what is right… what is right for you.
Do you want God to give you what you want… or what’s best?
Would your prefer an irresponsible, indulgent God? Would you want God to give you everything you want… or what is best? “We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God’s training so we can truly live?”
Knowing this, believing this, having faith in our heavenly Father, suffering and trials should not cause us to doubt God’s love. The writer assures us that, in fact, the opposite is true: suffering and trials are confirmation that God is your loving Father and you are his child.
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline —then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. (12:7-8 NIV)
— PART 3—
As God’s children, what is our responsibility to our Father?
You should not feel sorry for yourself. Remember the suffering Christ endured. Your suffering is not so bad. Don’t shrug off God’s discipline. Don’t give up. Don’t be crushed by it. Respect your Father. Appreciate what he’s doing for you. Understand what’s happening. Embrace your trials and be trained by them.
The suffering the writer of Hebrews is thinking of here includes persecution, but also more general suffering and trials that everyone who lives in this world faces. This is a “fallen” world, a world of suffering as a result of sin in the world, as a result of our estrangement from God (Genesis 3:14ff.; Romans 8:19-21). This is why the writer describes what his readers were enduring as an “all-out match against sin” (12:4). For Christians it is an ongoing battle with their own “flesh” and the “world,” in general, and, specifically with those who persecute them. The writer’s expectation was that all Christians will suffer in this way. This suffering is endemic to life in the world for the Christian. It’s God’s will that his children be “in the world” like Christ (John 17:15,18).“We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God” (Acts 14:22). Jesus told his disciples, “In this world you will have trouble” (John 16:33).
The suffering in mind here is not punishment; directed by God for some specific sin committed that needs to be repented of. There is that kind of sin and punishment (see Acts 5:1-11; 1 Corinthians 11:27-32; James 5:7-11 compare with 5:19-20). But this is discipline: “This trouble you're in isn't punishment; it's training, the normal experience of children…. …it pays off handsomely, for it's the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God” (12:7-8,11; see Romans 8:28-29).
How sad it is that we would just endure suffering, rather than embrace it; that the intended fruit of our Father’s discipline would be wasted and fail to bring the glory to God he so deserves (see John 15:1-2,8,16).
Here are some Scripture that talk about the benefits of suffering:
Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing. (James 1:2-4 NLT)
We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. (Romans 5:3-5 NLT)
These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. (1 Peter 1:7 NLT)
Discipline is easy to understand and appreciate, but hard to embrace.
We talk about the benefits of suffering and we admire those who embrace it and persevere through it. But it’s often a very different story when we ourselves have to endure it. “At the time, discipline isn’t much fun. It always feels like it’s going against the grain” (12:11). It’s not easy to suffer. Don’t expect it to be. Perseverance means it’s not going to miraculously, instantly be taken away by God. Trust in your heavenly Father won’t make it easy or painless, it will enable you to persevere, to endure the suffering. “So don't feel sorry for yourselves…. …don't shrug off God's discipline, but don't be crushed by it either” (12:5).
Trust will make your suffering fruitful. There are things you can only learn and have become a part of your life by enduring suffering. Character is developed over time—it comes from experience. It’s not “head” knowledge. Getting good teaching; following steps or prescriptions will never develop character. No matter how much an athlete learns about mechanics, techniques and strategies (these can be helpful) they are not substitutes for training, for experience, for the hard work that is the only way strength, the muscle-memory, endurance can be gained. There are no short-cuts around training. God knows this. That’s why, as a responsible, loving father he’s willing to allow you, his beloved child, to endure suffering… as discipline, for your good.
Finally, think about others, not just yourself. Be an example, a team player, an encouragement to your brothers and sisters, and a witness to the world by the way you accept trials from your Father and are trained by them.
12 So don’t sit around on your hands! No more dragging your feet! 13 Clear the path for long-distance runners so no one will trip and fall, so no one will step in a hole and sprain an ankle. Help each other out. And run for it!
Is the way you respond to trials and suffering an encouragement to others to trust their Father and be trained by it?
What about the pandemic we are currently suffering? How are you responding?
This is how I think God intends for me to be trained by this. I should be compassionate toward the suffering of others and pray for their relief. Compassion is a character quality I believe God intends to develop in his children as they suffer through empathizing with and acting to help others who suffer. “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters” (1 John 3:16-18; Matthew 25:31-46; Luke 10:25-37). Often my response to suffering is to become self-focused, self-centered, self-absorbed. I can be consumed with meeting my needs; with alleviating my suffering… and, perhaps, those closest to me. If I am doing well, I either forget about everyone else, or am proud and look down on others, as if their suffering was their own fault (see Luke 13:1-5; 18:9-14).
Jesus said the one who loses his life for his sake and for the gospel, will find it. The one who tries to save his life will lose it (Mark 8:34-35; John 12:24-25). Having hope in God, being children of God should make us more compassionate, understanding and merciful toward those who don’t have this hope or the assurance that the children of God have. “When he [Jesus] saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd” (Matthew 9:35-36). This is the way I want to respond. This is the kind of person I desire to be and, as his child, I know my Father deserves.
The second way I think our Father wants me to respond is with humility, surrender, brokenness, trust. We will be “crushed” by this suffering if we refuse to be humbled by it, if we refuse to admit our own weakness and our dependence on God. “Crushed” may not look like what it sounds like. “Crushed” may look like a complete recovery, the fruit of which is a building up of our pride and self-sufficiency from God. This pandemic is a stark reminder to me how weak I am, how fragile I am, how untrustworthy the things of this world are—money, healthcare, the government, etc.—that I keep falling back into putting my trust and hope in. The amount of misplaced trust I have put in these things is proportional to the pain I suffer when they are taken away, when God mercifully tries to open my eyes (heart) to the truth and exposes their inadequacy (see 1 Corinthians 10:1-14).
Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position. But the rich should take pride in their humiliation—since they will pass away like a wild flower. For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business. (James 1:9-11 NIV)
You're cheating on God. If all you want is your own way, flirting with the world every chance you get, you end up enemies of God and his way. And do you suppose God doesn't care? The proverb has it that "he's a fiercely jealous lover." And what he gives in love is far better than anything else you'll find. It's common knowledge that "God goes against the willful proud; God gives grace to the willing humble."
So let God work his will in you. Yell a loud no to the Devil and watch him scamper. Say a quiet yes to God and he'll be there in no time. Quit dabbling in sin. Purify your inner life. Quit playing the field. Hit bottom, and cry your eyes out. The fun and games are over. Get serious, really serious. Get down on your knees before the Master; it's the only way you'll get on your feet. (James 4:4-10 MSG; see 1 John 2:15-17)
Paul was facing a situation in which he “despaired of life itself.” “But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God…. On him we have set our hope… (2 Corinthians 1:8-11).
I want my chief concern to be trained by this, not just to get out of it.
God is acting like your heavenly Father,
are you acting like his loving child?